Friday, October 29, 2004

Liar, Liar?

I think the following article is great and very useful, however, next time I am confronted about maybe being dishonest, it will be hard to remain calm. (Remaining calm is one of the listed no, nos,) Even though I am being unjustly accused, (me, lie?)I will (I just know it) REMEMBER this article and be afraid to fidget, move suddenly, become too rigid, stare in your eyes, not look at your eyes enough.......

Think he (or she) is lying to you?

According to Sheri and Bob Stritof of about.com
25 signs to tell if someone is lying to you:
1. Touching the chin or rubbing the brow
2. Crossed arms or legs
3. Playing with hair
4. A line of perspiration on the brow if it isn't a warm day
5. Saying "no" several times
6. Continually denying accusations
7. Being extremely defensive
8. Providing more information and specifics than necessary
9. Inconsistencies in what is being shared
10. Body language and facial expressions don't match what is being said such as saying "no," but nodding the head up and down
11. Smugness
12. Placing a barrier, such as a desk or chair, in front of self
13. Uncommon calmness
14. Unwillingness to touch spouse during conversation
15. Being hesitant
16. Slouching posture
17. Rigidity or fidgeting
18. Differing behaviors; not acting in a usual fashion
19. Unnatural or limited arm and hand movements
20. Partial shrug
21. Lack of finger pointing
22. Unusual voice fluctuations, word choice, sentence structure
23. Stalling the conversation by repetitive use of pauses and comments like "um" or "you know"
24. Lack of use of contractions; prefers emphasizing "not" when talking
25. Avoidance of eye contact, eyes glancing to the right, staring past you, or turning away from you while talking

Monday, October 25, 2004

94 Days and Counting

office
Flicker foto
I have now been back in the South 94 days. I am still seeking permanent employment. I passed the pre-employment test for a job Saturday, but am still waiting for a call for the interview. It is not a job to get excited about. The pay would be deplorable.

I have been thinking alot about places I have worked and the people I have known. I had a Sales Assist job once, I was working for a printing company. One of the employees was an ex con. He had been convicted of all things of counterfeighting. At another job I worked with a woman that was still technically in the prison system. She had been locked up for 25 years for conspiracy to commit, she was living in a half-way house and had a work permit. She almost was released for good right before I left but it fell thru. The family of the person she had conspired to murder, apparently lobbied against her release, even if it was 25 years later.

I worked in the office of a mental health facility. While employed there we had a client (even if I could remember his name I would not be stupid enough to release it) who always carried a large paper grocery sack and a bowling ball bag. He would spend looooong amounts of time in the bathroom and would sit for hours out in the parking lot in his van with NO WINDOWS.

We had a client who, I swear, had good hand, bad hand tatoos. Angry that he was actually going to have to pay for counseling, he gave me a complete run down on why he hated women. He also explained to me why his ex love was "sinning" using his good hand, bad hands to elaborate. She was afraid of him. "Perfect love casts out all fear, he very patiently expounded, because his Honey Love", as he called her, " is afraid of him, she does not have perfect faith, therefore she is sinning". Right, ok, I can see that.....

If you have any stories of deranged co-workers or clients that you would like to share, post them in comments. You can remain anonymous.

Friday, October 22, 2004

Moo

Moo
Moo
Photo provided by freefoto.com
I stayed home with my kids for 11 years and MY college degree was my ex-husband's. A dumb move, that one, to let your spouse get the education while you rest on your laurels, typewriter, dirty dishes and pacifiers or whatever else you may be resting or busting your butt on. Now years later, he has a BA with a double major and a MA degree and I, well I have me and very little college. I do plan to take online classes next summer.

In late October of 2000 my job of 5 years ended, my marriage ended about the same time as well . The job ending was a site closure. A common thing, I am afraid these days. I had severence and a little time and I blew some opportunities. Feeling fairly superior, I turned down some decent positions because I "was looking for something else". Once, I managed to lose 2 jobs in one day. I found a job, got a better job offer, quit the job I had found, only to have the job offer retracted because the ex-employee of gold called them and was wanting to come back. Thus is life. Christmas loomed quickly and I was in a panic. I ended up moving out of the house, (letting my ex move in so all would not be lost) losing a car and some dignity. Things did end well, I did find a good job but then had to wait 2 months for the position to open. I worked some temporary jobs until my permanent job began. Fast forward to 2004, and much to my chagrin, I am again looking.

If you read my Cowgirl post, you know I have relocated from one state to another and am seeking employment. Sadly, things have not changed much. I have worked a series of temporary jobs but have not yet found permanent employment. I've done the usual dumb things, not take a permanent position because a temp that was more interesting opened up. (Note if you are out there and have been in my shoes and have some input, feel free to email me with advise) I have gone on a couple of interviews and actually test for a permanent job this weekend with a embarrassing laughable base pay. I have another interview with another temp agency next week. So far this week I am batting 0.


I have interviewed far some sales jobs and could take one now, if was able to live off of %100 commission, go a few weeks with no income, spam my friends and family with sales attempts to tide me over until I could get my toes in the business community. I am not able to do that at this time and do not know if it would be wise at any time. I am trying hard not to be bitter. Maybe I could sell cars.......

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Kitty Litter Blues

After a dormant period, I have recently become obsessed with politics. I thought I would take a break. There are two articles posted on AZRepublics website today. They are both about seemingly disturbed people doing strange things with fire. The first article is about a Georgia man who after watching the movie "The Day After", is so inspired by the people lighting fires to stay alive, that he torches his house. (is it COLD this time of year in GEORGIA???) The second is about a woman in Washington so depressed by her smelly cat litter that she burns down her apartment.

I am a reluctant pet owner. I can relate to kitty litter hatred. My cat is huge and fat and has an over abundance of hair. I shudder whenever I look at his feet. I just know they are toilet feet. It is time for HIS BATH again. I have been informed by a very young veterinarian that CATS HATE WATER, as if this were a mystery only a select few were privy to. She seemed to feel it is abusive to bath your cat. I feel I am the one being abused while I am bathing the cat.
I not only have to deal with the rebellious wet cat, I have to listen to my now very, very, pregnant daughter who agrees initially that the cat does indeed need a bath, hysterically shrieking, "don't get water in his eyes!" "You are holding him down, don't hold him down!" "You aren't supposed to bath cats!", etc.

If I were REALLY deranged, I might use both of these articles. After watching "The Day After", I might become so inspired by the poor cold people burning things to stay alive that I might ignite the cat litter in an effort to stay warm (since it is so cold this time of year in Mississippi) The cat might decide to visit the ignited cat litter box. That would take care of all my cat problems. The litter would be clean, the cat would not need a bath and his hair quotient would be greatly reduced.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

Mississippi River Bridge

Away from home and homesick, we always greeted
the Mississpi river bridge that connects Mississippi and Louisiana, like an old friend.
Mississippi River Bridge
Mississippi River Bridge,
originally uploaded at Flicker
Photo provided by flicker
http://www.bobbieo.com/


On Being Bitter and Learning to Balance a Checkbook

Do you ever get bitter?? I have a tendency to be bitter from time to time. The cycle is pretty predictable, first comes the self pity, then the superiority complex, (smarter, yes smarter than everyone else) then the bitterness.

I have recently gone through the cycle and now am on the downside. Now I can laugh at the self pity, superiority complex, and get over the bitterness. This last bitter cycle was brought on by my recent relocation. It is not easy to pull up roots, move and adjust to a new (but familar) climate, living quarters, etc.... Everything that was old is new again.

I have also had to make financial adjustments. I was married for 19 years and am now divorced. For most of this time period I was not involved in the finances. I did not have to balance a checkbook. I did not have to deal with finances at all. Period. Things are a tad bit different now. I am having to adjust to not having instant banking online. When I lived in Arizona, the bank I dealt with had a wonderful online web site. I never wrote checks just used my debit card. Every time I used my card I could go home and pull my account up and like magic the transaction was posted on my account. And mercifully, if you had a deposit go in on the same day as a debit, even if the debit came in before the deposit, overdraft charges would not apply.

Sadly things are not the same in my permanent and original home state. My account is periodically a mess. My oldest daughter keeps telling me, MOM just right down your checks and debits in your check book. "Write them down?" I thought to myself. What a antiquated idea. (I of course was in the middle of the superiority stage) Well, I have learned if you don't write the things down, things don't go so smoothly. I am going to have to write the crap down, quit whining and stop thinking the world exists for my convenience.

I have learned when I am feeling sorry for myself..
I do not notice the beauty around me
When I am being superior...
I discount other people's thoughts and feelings and do not learn

When I am being in general DERANGED.....things do not go well